Hurricane

 

ImageThat massive hurricane that can be destructive seems so calm on the inside. The eye of the storm can be pleasing. Calming. Soothing. You don’t want to leave it, you feel like everything else around you is what’s destructive. Gray colored glasses with a shade of uncertainty. You complete a 360 spin and all around you is destruction. This massive swirl of chaos. So you stay in the center of that hurricane, it feeds you. Calmly breathing life into you at 25 mph, but what happens when you’re forced out of that center into the fray? Into that destructive, uncontrollable, misleading, and gray abyss. Every doubt you’ve had comes to life. At least you tell yourself that, but they’ve been there all along. The eye of the storm has left you weak, unable to deal with the troubles of what’s outside. You’re just as an infant. Clawing and scratching at something just to feel tangible, not even aware of what life is. You yearn for some kind of resolution. You just want to return to the center. So you let go. You let go of who you are and everything you told yourself you wouldn’t be. The storm rages around you and you just close your eyes, wanting it to be over. Leaving is an option, but you just want to be back in the center. It was safe there wasn’t it? You attempt to peer through the chaos to find your way back and just when you think you’ve found it. The winds get stronger and they blow you further away, losing more of yourself with each attempt to return to that false haven. Just before your last effort you realize that even though the eye of the storm is calm and inviting. It is still a part of the storm. Your mind snaps and bends trying to disprove this theory, but you know it to be true. Why did it take this long to realize this? 45 days. Wars have ended in shorter time than that. You never tried leaving the storm and it’s as easy as opening your eyes. There you are floating, on the outside. You see the Hurricane for exactly what it was. A raging storm. And for the first time, in a long time. You breathe.

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