Musings of a Drunken Time-traveler

Musings of a Drunken Time-traveler

I miss her.
And I hate that I do.
The crevices of my intellect rust over without her.
I am nocturnal in a time when the sun never sets.
Unable to reflect because every decision is made anew.
The blueprint is hard to understand without the architect.
I wish she would just call me randomly at an obscure time.

3:21pm

When I’m reading just before leaving work.
Learning about how to better my life.
I wish she would just call me.
I want to say hello to her once more.
I want to greet her one more time.
I sit alone on this throne.
As the poison exhales through my pores.
Thinking about an ancient time when I could hear my heartbeat.


I use to text her poetry.
When we were in love.
And when love seemed absent.
Poetry is what I would send her.
Maybe I should have sent myself in every text.
In every text that I felt to send.
Maybe I should have sent myself.
Started my car and drove to where she was.
I often wonder if she doubted my devotion.
My love.
If she doubted that I felt for her the way I did.
If I felt like the rings of Saturn only remained in place because of her.
My best memories of my life include her.
Did my parents fail in sheltering me from harsh truths that I could not yet fathom?
Or was she simply more than I could bare.
I want another.

Untitled 001

Untitled 001

I love how different we are
How like stars we are
Complex with similar elements to let us know we all belong to the same existence
Walking around I take note of the differences and I acknowledge the spectrum
Taking note that we’re starting to realize that life isn’t so binary
Life isn’t So black and white
Life isn’t So wrong and right
Understanding that life is like a romance novel where you go back and read your favorite chapters
Where you remember the laughter
and the conversations and contemplation
The ones that made you a better observer.
A better listener
A better lover
A better friend
Someone who lives and breathes with compassion.

Lemonade & Success

Lemonade & Success

She walks through the door with open pores.
Fresh out the shower.
Told me to give her an hour while she gets dressed.
I am stressed, no less, and I protest.
But I don’t mind.
She’s the reason why I haven’t chased my dreams even though I dream of her.
She’s the reason why my words slur.
You never hear guys talk about their toes curling, but I’ll be the first to admit that she made me do that shit the first time she drunk white wine from my wine glass.


She comes out dressed in red.
Navigates to the bed and sits down and she commences to start a conversation about what we’re doing tonight.
After a slow pause reply with ‘whatever you want. but I can offer suggestions if you’re mind isn’t made up.’
A soft touch felt on my heart as her eyes looks my way.
A grin from both of us as we decide to stay at home for the night.
So we can sit on the porch under moonlight and discuss what our dreams taste like.
Lemonade and Success

Mint Julep

Mint Julep

I wonder if I’ll find love here.
The women are either already involved.
Think religion is their only salvation.
Or they’re just not into me. And they think me weird.

Should I suffocate my desire for love until the flame of my passion expires?
Or admire every woman that catches my eye from a far.
Let me examine myself through the Hubble telescope because a mirror doesn’t show enough detail.
I don’t think self examination will show exactly what other’s see when they see me.
The swelling grey nimbus causes me to be oblivious to the short comings that are obvious through the binoculars of those that I’m attracted to.
Often times I cater to the empty husk of someone who already gave their love away to someone undeserving.
Sometimes I feel like I’m the property on the monopoly board that no one wants to buy.
However.
There will come a time when someone will step into my life and realize that I am Park Place, Boardwalk, and all four of the railroads in one.
My experiences have taught me patience.
There is no perfect life partner, but I do believe harmony can be obtained through effort.
Sometimes I wonder if it’s my belief in what it means to be a black male.
I can defend you; With the resilience of armor forged in Mount Doom of Mordor.
I also have no shame in shedding the layers of my soul to you when it feels like the Earth’s gravity has been multiplied by 100.
There will be times when I need you to be my Senzu Bean.
And if there ever came a time when we both were in bad shape, believe that I would break my last one in half for you.
I spoke with an older couple one night and they looked as if they were still in the honeymoon phase.
They both offered the same advice when I commented on how refreshing it was to see them enjoying each other’s company over drinks.
They both gave the same advice as I was sipping my mint julep through the cold ice cubes.
‘never settle.’

Kindred Stranger(spoken word)

Kindred Stranger(spoken word)

 

I have watched my kin argue over which sin is greater.

Is the greatest sin to not love the one that sits beside you in your calmest moments.

To those that think otherwise. Float on I say. Float on.

Why don’t we talk about¬†which star is the brightest in the sky; Instead we contemplate whose status update deserves the most likes.

Yes this is another social media bashing recital.

Another speech about false idols.

We all heard what J. Cole said, now let’s match his effort.

I dare you to write down your goals in the morning for a week and tell me there’s no progress

We want the best and we deserve no less yet we regress to what’s familiar.

I feel like this is what my parents would have said to me if they feared like I wouldn’t reach my full potential.

They built a ladder for me so I wouldn’t have to worry about it.

If anyone knows my dad, they know he likes to build things.

I have seen the rivers of time unwind before my mind’s eye in my dreams and I say only to the majority of you, because everyone isn’t ready to be shaken and reawakened into the beings they were born to be.

Wasted souls will fall to the wayside with looks of surprise apon their eyes.

When they realize that yes we can fly.

Higher than we ever thought possible.

Unstoppable is the word that is uttered throughout the halls of my ancestors.

People always ask me:

Joe, what is that you believe in?

I believe in family, my friends, my kin, and myself.

Above all else.

I know myself and I know my potential.

I want to cast fire from my fingertips to kindle and inspire those around me.

It took me a few years to realize that just because they surround you, doesn’t mean they won’t ground you.

I’m not saying that my loyalty has changed, but sometimes you have to step back out of the sunlight so a flower can grow.

The only neutrally good and infinite thing in this world is love and joy.

So why not just be cool?

And spread it to a kindred stranger and tell them to pay it forward.

Concrete Sponge(spoken word)

Concrete Sponge(spoken word)

I imagine that the last breath that escapes my chest would be produced from a bullet.

Not from me protecting my family from an intruder or being caught in the crossfire of a deranged active shooter.

But just because I am.

Because I exist in this shade of skin I am at risk.

Several fragments of metal will rip my being asunder as I grasp at the explanation as to why my lungs are filling with blood.

While my knees grow weak and my body grows cold like the stares I receive in public when I voice my opinion.

My mouth gaping trying to produce words, but all that forms are more puddles of blood as my face lay shaking on concrete.

I hope in that final moment that I can see the universe.

I want to quantify how insignificant we all are.

My mind expanding faster than the speed of the bullet that created the keyhole to my death.

Exhaling the moment my ancestors come into my vision.

I just hope.

Before that day comes I get a chance to fulfill my mission.

Which is

To live.